Self-Forced Shirt Toss

After doing the trash last week I walked to the bedroom with the intention to pick one T-shirt to toss. I had been thinking I have too many T-shirts, many of which I do not wear. I pulled them all out and could not pick one right away. Perfectly good shirts, some with memories attached. One really old one I was keeping only for the design printed on it, never to wear. I cut the design out of this one and tossed the shirt.

Also I got rid of a souvenir shirt that my mother gave to me decades ago as a joke (the design was a slightly humiliating comment on my behavior). I disliked the mockery of the shirt, but always kept it because it fit me and was a durable shirt that lasted all this time. I pulled hard at the collar to see if it would rip, but it didn’t. Really a well-made shirt! But it was my oldest one and it went out. Tossing it felt odd, like saying goodbye to a familiar friend. Maybe I felt that because I had it for so long? I really can feel resistance to discarding things and irrational attachment to them, but after they’re gone I don’t really miss them.

That reminds me of an old pair of boots that was one of the first things to go when I started to get rid of things. I wore these boots all the time every day and these were getting in bad shape. Replacement shoes were bought, but putting these super-comfortable boots in the trash was one of the hardest things ever. More than once during the night and the next morning I thought about taking them back out of the trash. But I stuck to my decision and forced myself to drive past the trashcan on my way to work. Now, years later I remember how comfortable they were, but don’t miss the worn-out shoes with splitting soles.

Five Boxes

My storage unit is hard to get to in the winter because of the snow and ice on the ground. It’s not heated, and I don’t want to risk carrying heavy things on icy walkways. I haven’t been there yet this year. Therefore I’ve been trying to focus on organizing/purging what is with me here in my rented living space.

Most of my possessions here are inside cardboard bankers boxes. Not including the stuff stored inside (and on top of) furniture, the floor, and in the closet. My efforts last year on this reduction project led to throwing out the randomly sized cardboard boxes I had picked up along the way during my years of “collecting”. Enough volume was purged so that the remainder could fit only in the bankers boxes I had. About 20 boxes now, which is a huge improvement. They could be put into one truckload if I had to move, so I do feel a bit of freedom. Plus it helps my sanity that the boxes are a uniform size and shape. Having randomly sizes boxes and baskets of things piled up around me was much harder to deal with. When four boxes are stacked up on the floor I perceive it as one tower of stuff instead of hundreds of little cluttery things to look at. Less overwhelming to live with day-to-day.

But I don’t want to live with all this junk of course, so the plan is to reduce the number of boxes. Everything is now sorted into five general categories. My ultimate goal (perhaps unreachable) for this Spring season is to reduce all of this down to only five bankers boxes, one for each category.

1. Paper – for my files, projects, archives
2. Books – this will be really tough, but only one box of all my books and magazines
3. Tools – all physical utility items, including kitchen utensils
4. Media – DVDs, music CDs, photographs, cards, letters
5. Random – a “clutter at hand” box

The random box is for miscellaneous stuff that I don’t know where it goes, so it usually winds up on various flat surfaces. I’ll use a bankers box just for the random clutter. When I’m not clear on where something goes, it goes in the box. Then I can clean it out and put things away once in a while. The agreement with myself must be that my limit on this stuff is that one box. This way it’ll be limited and kinda organized.

Advice for a friend

Dear Friend in limbo

If you have anything with you that is being kept because you believe it has POTENTIAL* value, then I advise you to get rid of it.

Why? Because any physical object that you are possessing because of it’s potential usefulness or value is holding you in your current situation. These things are like spiritual anchors. Or links in a chain that is binding you to your current state of being.

*POTENTIAL means that:

1. You are saving it because it may be useful if a desired situation occurs. Don’t worry about that. If one day you are in a place where you truly need it, you can get another one.

2. You are saving it because you think it might have value to someone else. Don’t waste your energy imagining what someone else might think at some point in the future. Sell it right now for anything you can get. If you can’t sell it, give it away or trash it.

Sincerely,

Bakelite

PS. Don’t get rid of money. Money is different because it is a commodity – it has actual, not potential value. Keep the commodities.